Dear Kitten

posted 2 weeks ago · 0 notes
#lol #video


posted 2 weeks ago · 0 notes
#lol #haunted


This is the best thing I’ve seen in a long time

posted 1 month ago · 1 note
#horror #funny #lol #magic #food


An actual conversation I just had with my sister 

Ugh, my back hurts
Twat?
I said I cunt believe my back hurts so bad
Wow you snatched that one right up didn’t you
It’s quite pussyble
Oh labi-alone
Clit it!
It’s unvulvalivable
Wow…you sure muffed that one up
You should eat more vagtables then maybe your back wouldn’t hurt

posted 2 months ago · 1 note
#lol #puns #funny


It gets worse the more you read (x)

posted 3 months ago · 0 notes
#lol #conspiracy #crazy


This is the best conspiracy I’ve ever seen (x)

This is the best conspiracy I’ve ever seen (x)

posted 3 months ago · 2 notes
#lol #wtf


I just found this resignation letter and the honest translation in my drafts and wow 

XXXX,

I am writing to announce my resignation from XXXX, effective two weeks from this date.

I hate to spring this on you before the holidays but I have been given the opportunity to study and work in the field I have been going to school for. This was not an easy decision to make on my part, but have come to the conclusion that my current situation prevents me from dedicating enough time to my work. The past six months have been very rewarding. I’ve enjoyed working for you and hope to leave the company on good terms.

Thank you for the opportunities for growth that you have provided me.

I wish you and the company all the best. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Listen up bitch,

I have had it up to here with the intense levels of bullshit you sons of bitches have thrown my way and if it weren’t for me needing a goddamn reference from you fuck nuggets I’d sashay my happy ass out of here faster than you could blink that lazy eye of yours. 

You could not pay me enough to stick around for the hellish parade of evil that will no doubt consume every square inch of this business come black Friday. If I have to struggle to stay afloat in a sea of raging children coupled by parents hell bent on ignoring “their little angels” I swear to fuck I will grab the closest solid object and give each and every one of those little bastards a whoopin’ to which even Lucifer himself would sit back like, “Damn.” And to be honest? My first class and work study doesn’t even start till after Christmas. But if I hear one more goddamned popgun that one tiny shred of sanity I have left will break releasing a flow of homicidal rage that beings of consciousness have not yet experienced on this plane of existence. 

Quitting this job was the easiest decision I have ever made in my entire life. 

If I could take a searing hot poker and shove it into my brain in order to erase the memories I’ve collected while working in this establishment, I would not even think to hesitate. I would rather spend the next six months in the 9th circle of Hell than spend even one more second wearing this HIDEOUS uniform comparable to that of a zoo keeper. 

To conclude, fuck you. Fuck your company. Fuck your customers. Fuck your pretty scented candles and your ridiculous line of cameo clothing. Fuck your insane psychopathic need to stuff the bodies of dead animals and mount them on every flat surface. You sick sick bastards. And popguns. Fuck them in particular. 

No longer yours,
Sora

posted 3 months ago · 1 note


The ghost of Voldemort

The ghost of Voldemort

posted 5 months ago · 1 note


ashenfires:

love me

this is the best card ive ever recieved

ashenfires:

love me

this is the best card ive ever recieved



If you say you’ve never done this, you’re lying